How The Peacock Got His Squawk.

Once upon a time, My Lovely, in the forests of what we now call India, there was a beautiful Peacock who loved to brag about his gorgeous singing voice. He once told a Thoughtful Magpie, whose singing voice wasn’t as beautiful back then, My Lovely, that his singing voice was dreadful and sounded like claws scraping down a cliff. This had insulted the Magpie, who burst into tears. The Narcistic Peacock later went on to insult the Crow, the Swallow, the Eagle, the Beagle, the Labrador, the Boar, the Pig, the Talking Twig and the really *very* Tooty Hooty Owl. Till at last, My Lovely there was only one animal who hadn’t been insulted by this bird with his utterly disgusting behaviour. This was the Small Tender Robin who always had been the good-looking bird’s only friend for all his life.

The Selfish Peacock told his dear friend that he wanted to make sure that every creature in the land had heard his beautiful singing voice. The Tender Robin suggested enticingly,

“Would you like to sing to the most powerful being of peace and leadership?”

The Selfish Peacock liked his idea, as he grew a grin as big and as bright as a crescent moon and asked excitedly as he fanned his tail of a thousand eyes,

“Of course, but where would I find such a being?”

The Tender Robin took a deep breath, readied his voice to explain to this narcissistic bird,

“Fly 100 Miles North-West, then 2 Miles South, 0.5 Miles West and do a jump. You will find a gloomy god on an island of century old clouds.”

The Peacock was more than excited, My Lovely. It seemed that the Robin blinked once and the Peacock was 40 miles North-West. The Peacock followed the instructions with great excitement. Then he saw a grumpy God sitting on century old clouds, in the middle of said island, wearing a green and red diamond encrusted robe. He was one lonely God of the forests and streams of India. The Peacock asked The God,

“Why the mood?”

The God did not reply because he was mad at the Peacock because of what he had done, insulting all the animals, elderly to young as far as Africa. The Peacock said,

“I’ll cheer you up dear God of Peace and Leadership by singing greater than any animal or God in the land.”

This made the God infuriated and fiery. Five hours later the Peacock and the God were still there, the Peacock hadn’t yet sung to the God, instead just bragged him to death. The God finally snapped,

“WILL YOU SING ALREADY YOU NARCICISSTIC, BRAGGING, ANNOYING ANIMAL WITH ONE FRIEND, YOU…”

– Then silence arose around the land.  The Peacock was intimidated by the God’s anger, it stunned the Peacock into a state of silence.  The God had calmed down and spoke,

“Your punishment will be faced when you get back home.”

The God teleported The Peacock back home as soon as possible as he didn’t want to hear any more from him.

Once The Peacock arrived home, he decided to start singing, “ahhhhhhhaAHHAahajHBnanjm”

“wha wha what happened?”

screamed the Peacock angrily. The ever so Tender Robin said,

“You faced your punishment.”

And then flew away leaving the Peacock as lonely and confused as ever.

So, my lovely, as the God did not want to waste the beautiful singing voice of the selfish Peacock. The God decided to give the harmonious voice to the Thoughtful Magpie, as he had been the main victim of the Peacocks enormous list of insults. The Peacock was rather upset with his new squawk, but he had an idea.  Later the Peacock found the Crow and said,

“Hello dear crow, I dearly bet that you cannot screech like this”

The Peacock went on to brag all over again for the rest of his life. Now my lovely, you don’t want to find out how the same Peacock got his strut.